Habitual lateness. Disorganization. Not following up on action steps. Finding everything else to do but what we really need to be doing.
Self-sabotage takes on a variety of guises and affects people of all ages, professions and economic levels. But it always leads to not living the life we want for ourselves.
Take this Self-Quiz to see whether you might be working against yourself in some areas.
1. It takes me at least a half hour to locate a document I need to send to someone.
2. I can be indecisive and fearful, and as a result, chances often pass me by.
3. I tend to start projects with great gusto but have great difficulty finishing them.
4. My financial situation is chronically chaotic.
5. My actions often jeopardize my relationships, my job and/or my financial stability.
6. I worry a lot about what others think of me.
7. I tend to give in to compulsive behaviors to overeat or partake excessively of unhealthy substances or activities.
8. I seem to be struggling constantly.
9. I’ve been told I have a problem expressing anger appropriately.
10. I often put off the things I need and want to do. Procrastination and reliability are problems for me.
11. I’m still not living the life I truly want, and I’m starting to lose hope that I ever will.
12. When I really want to do something, I frequently have the thought that I can’t or shouldn’t do it.
13. My relationships tend to eventually fall apart or I stay in unhealthy relationships.
14. When I think about working out, I immediately start thinking about all the other things I should be doing instead. Exercise rarely wins.
15. I’m often late to work and late with assignments; this has hurt my career.
16. I avoid confrontation and/or fawn over others in order to be liked and win their favor.
78. I repeatedly make self-deprecating, belittling comments about myself.
18. I know I have the potential to do more with my life if I could just get out of my own way.
Self-defeating behaviors often mask a fear of change and growing. When we deliberately hamper our own efforts, we get to avoid the knowledge that we have choices that we can make.
Just imagine the life we could be having if we put as much energy and creativity into manifesting our goals as we do avoiding them. Tweet That!
Tell me in the comments: What small step can you take today to kick fear in the face and show yourself some love today?
It’s not easy to change self-sabotaging patterns, but with time and practice—and a good dose of self-love—it is possible to end a self-defeating cycle and live the life we truly want for ourselves.
If you found yourself identifying with many of the statements above, don’t feel discouraged! Change is HARD for all of us, but you don’t have to do it alone. I’d love to come alongside you on your journey to loving yourself and finding freedom to live the life you want. Send me a note today.